Should All Blokes Try a Bit of Travel?
What a Time to Be Alive!
In the UK, we have information at our fingertips, high-quality on-demand TV content, instantaneous communication, oodles of dank memes, and a seriously good variety of beer in every shop. We should be happier and more content than ever, shouldn’t we?
Well, I won’t dig into the grim statistics, but let’s just say we aren’t – not at all. Blokes, in particular, seem to be in an especially grotty mental space these days. We really are a miserable lot of oafs at the moment… This topic is quite deep, with many interesting societal and psychological threads that I won’t pull at in this blog. But without meaning to gloss over these serious issues, I want to offer my thoughts on some of the main mental blocks, and how traveling can help!
Conquering the Four Horsemen of Feeling Stagnant
Fear: The Unknown is Scary… Duh!
Fear is an obvious one, right? It’s daunting to consider heading into a strange place where they don’t call that glorious amber stuff ‘beer,’ your next meal could land you in the toilet for the next two days, and you don’t have a clue what anyone is saying.
It’s scary and very exposing too! I recall not being able to sleep a wink for the first couple of nights when I landed in Thailand for my first solo trip. It didn’t help that my debit card got sucked into an ATM on the first evening – it was horrible to be frank… I know, I know, that isn’t the best sales pitch! However, I dealt with it, moved on, and the next issue I ran into felt a little less scary, and the next even less so.
The only time I have been almost too scared to cope since then was when I was told there might not be any beer in the San Blas islands. But luckily, they did have beer… Phew!
In all seriousness, in this modern era brimming with easily-accessible wonderment, people are losing their ability to deal with fear. We’re all becoming more risk-averse, and dare I say it, blokes even more so.
Remember building a ramp in the park as a kid, riding over it faster and faster until you either chickened out or face-planted? Or perhaps you had only one life left on a PlayStation game, but you took on the final bad guy for ultimate glory instead of trekking back to a checkpoint to save? We all did that kind of stuff as kids because, when we faced the fear, took the risk, and it paid off, the feeling of accomplishment was worth it!
When you throw yourself into a foreign place, you will inevitably face challenges. I guarantee it. But I also assure you that you’ll find a way to handle them, and the next problem, and the one after that too! The feeling of accomplishment will follow, without fail!
Confidence: Scrap the Constant Comparison!
It’s easy to scroll through social media and feel completely inadequate in comparison. Everyone does it, even for the silliest things. I often find myself disheartened by how effortlessly witty and natural some people appear in front of a camera! As soon as one is aimed at me, I instantly regress a few millennia and devolve into a confused, blithering ape, unable to form a coherent sentence, let alone any witty or intelligent dialogue!
That said, I think it’s a part of human nature and, unfortunately, unavoidable. You can let it either drive you to improve or let it crush your confidence. Nowadays, with the entire world’s worth of talented individuals on a screen in our palms, the constant exposure can be quite powerful. Basically, we are faced with an infinate source of skewed comparison.
The thing is, if we use what we see around us as the baseline for our capabilities, we’ll never truly feel confident in ourselves. Confidence will always seem out of reach because there will always be someone doing something slightly different or slightly better. My take on self-confidence is simple: it’s about understanding and accepting your own capabilities, no matter how grand or modest they may be.
For example, I’m confident that I can knock out a five-kilometre run in twenty-five minutes without much trouble (even if I only do it a few times a year). Now, if I tried to run that same distance in twenty minutes flat, I’d probably collapse, cry, and soil myself; a far cry from those impressive runners you see online and on the telly. I have to realise that they are basically playing a different game, so I don’t compare myself to them or feel any less confident about my ability to finish the distance at my own pace! My point is, having confidence doesn’t mean that you have to feel like you’re the best; it’s about knowing without doubt, you can achieve what you set out to do. Which leads me nicely on to why travel is such a powerful tool for boosting and building confidence.
When you’re on an adventure, you rely solely on yourself, which provides constant and undeniable feedback about your capabilities. You quickly learn what you can do and achieve, with real-time evidence of your successes and failures. For example:
– Can you navigate to a bus station in a place where no one speaks English?
– Can you jog a mile with your backpack on to catch a train leaving in twenty minutes?
By depending on yourself, you have no choice but to discover these things and calibrate your self-awareness as you go. Then, if something isn’t as you’d like, you work on it; otherwise, you accept it and become confident in your ability as it is!
Inhibitions: Who Cares What They Think?
As a confused, blithering ape, I have to admit that I am rather stricken by inhibitions. I couldn’t even begin to explain where they came from, and in truth, I’m not entirely sure I care. All I know is that inhibitions can really get in the way and block things that could otherwise be amazing or even life-changing!
In case you’re thinking, “Oi baldie, inhibitions and confidence are the same thing!” I’ve separated them because, in my mind, inhibitions are specifically human-centric; they’re all based on how you think you may be perceived by others.
Personally, inhibitions that have blocked the idea of travel for me come in two forms:
– ‘I’m going to have to fraternise with all these hip cool travel types, aren’t I?’ – Feeling like fellow tourists are going to think I’m a proper plonker.
– ‘Who do I think I am?’ – Feeling like people around me secretly think I am too old, bald, and desperate to be going traveling.
You may think these are a bit vague and silly, and I would agree, but I’m just trying to highlight the overarching themes that have played on my mind. You can drill down into them and find more specific and awkward issues; for example, being on camera! I hate it and worry that we will inevitably meet people abroad who love to film everything and everyone. Or even writing this blog… I mean, what will my colleagues think? They know me as the ‘kinda-crap engineer who turns up at the office just to stare into space and ask base questions,’ not the ‘wannabe travel blogger’!
You get my point, right?
Unlike the section on self-confidence above, many inhibitions can be actively avoided or suppressed. For example, I could be entirely anti-social while abroad, avoiding as much human interaction as possible… I could also take this blog down and just keep a personal journal. Unfortunately, overcoming this sort of mental block requires some personal effort and conviction, which travel alone will not force. Although, I do have an advantage here; Mary-Ann doesn’t let me get away with being anti-social, plying me with alcohol when I’m grumpy in the evenings. I don’t condone that by the way… But in truth, if she doesn’t do it, I just end up plying myself with booze.
In all seriousness, travel won’t force you to dump your inhibitions, but it does offer the over used cliché, which is the chance to ‘reinvent yourself.’ I’m not saying you just need a fresh start or anything like that, I’m just highlighting that you’ll be surrounded by people you don’t know or have any ties to. It could be an opportunity to try something new and learn something valuable. I’m going into our trip with this mantra in mind! You never know, I may even learn how to remain human when a camera is pointed at me (though I doubt it…).
Motivation: Netflix or your next trips?
Imagine sitting in your house that you’ve spent three years refurbishing, marvelling at the delightful shade of green you picked for the feature wall in the living room. You flick open your banking app on your phone and drool at the pile of savings you’ve managed to nurture, and you suddenly begin to wonder what more you need. Questions circle your mind, such as:
– “Wouldn’t it be so easy to buy a huge TV, a PS5, and spend my days enjoying the fruits of my labour? I could probably get a takeaway every evening for a year! Mmmm, yes, that sounds comfortable…”
– “Should I not be using this carefully curated position to springboard myself into a better long-term financial position? Shouldn’t I be buying a second house or investing it all?”
I used those examples because I’ve grappled with both scenarios’ multiple times, and this is where motivation comes in! I mean it in a couple of senses: being motivated enough to invest the time and effort into what you want to do, and more importantly, understanding your personal motivation for doing it.
So, the first step involves a bit of soul-searching. What do you want, and why do you want it? If you discover that it’s travel, then fantastic – welcome to the club! But it could be anything; this principle applies to many areas of life. For this blog though, we’re focusing on why bald blokes (and other kinds of humans too) should travel. The good news is that it’s a great target to go for because it’s both extremely plannable and measurable!
You can break it into attainable chunks and create a plan to get yourself in a position to buy your ticket and board that plane! Sticking to a disciplined and prolonged routine is a valuable exercise for anyone – read my blog on ‘patient saving’!
It’s overused but true; if you trudge through the difficult times, the reward of the end is so much more rewarding! Unless it’s DIY, of course… that somehow remained unrewarding even once I’d done it… Probably doesn’t help that I am a blithering ape with a hammer too.
Conclusion: Get Out There, Bald or Not!
In conclusion, travel offers a wealth of benefits. I genuinely believe you can’t emerge from the experience as anything less than a more well-rounded individual – unless, of course, you accidentally become one of those influencers that spout complete bo**ocks on social media… Particularly for blokes these days who often seem to be a bit adrift, stepping out and having a real adventure is genuinely priceless. You’ll come back feeling more accomplished, with greater self-trust, and with new insights you never anticipated. Also, if you’re planning to return to work, you’ll likely find yourself more proficient and employable! If you like facts and figures, just check out this: Traveling makes you more employable. So, get out there and see the world – you won’t regret it!
Even if you don’t fancy coming back to work again, the act of traveling will at the very least introduce you to more people and increase your chances of serendipitous moments. Put it this way; you definitely won’t stumble across the opportunity of a lifetime by staying glued to your sofa in front of Netflix. Waiting for your head hairs slowly retreat down your back until they join up with the ones on your arse… It’s too late for me on that front.
I haven’t even touched on the profound impact travel can have on mental health. Personally, I attribute overcoming many of my own mental battles to travel. It’s an unsung hero in that regard, really… But that could easily be a topic for an entirely different blog!
So, guys, gals, and baldies, definitely give travel a shot! If it doesn’t work out for you, reach out to me and I’ll offer you a full emotional refund (in the form of a pint).
Stay bald, folks.
Toodles,
Jack
